fear

Unsolicited Advice from the Adventures of a Lowly Shop-girl

July, 2018

 

Concepts I Have Put into Practice

A couple of years ago, I was working in a beautiful office at a formerly great place that had just been purchased by a corporation. Things were pretty good, but morale was rapidly deteriorating as the corporate big wigs were implanting their uncomfortable and ineffective ideas into a healthy business. In short, they were ruining it! Lucky for me, I got fired.

With 3 days to go to my vacation, just back from bereavement leave, and a mortgage to pay as a single gal, I was a little concerned. I found myself in the very same situation where so many people are finding themselves today…unemployed. But not only unemployed, also frightened, uncertain and basically freaked out. My level of education either over-qualified or under-qualified me, even though my schooling did not support what I really wanted to be doing, yet going back to school seemed an unlikely option. Selling all of my belongings and moving to a different city was not a viable possibility, either. My cats would hate it and I really like the stuff I’ve collected too much to sell it all. Aaahhh, what to do? Confusion and fear began to set in. I knew, I just knew that fear would be my worst enemy. So first and foremost, I made a pact to come up with any way possible to refute fear.

Concept #1 –Counter thoughts of FEAR with thoughts of GRATITUDE. Fear is generally based in ‘lack of something’. The easiest and best way to counter it is to focus on what you DO have in your life and how much you appreciate it!

I then did what any responsible person would do. I promptly headed to my psychic.

Concept #2 – Gather information from a trusted resource, i.e. a respected friend, a good psychic, your own research of what appeals to you.

In the past she had told me that I was going to buy my house, (when I had no way of accomplishing that), meet certain friends, travel to certain places, be in certain circumstances, all of which at the time of her telling me I thought, “Yeah, right!” But each and every time, she was spot on. She was absolutely correct at every turn. This time she told me not to worry about my current unemployment situation as I would soon become an energy worker. Once again, true to form, I thought, “Yeah, right!,” completely forgetting the previous six months training in Holographic Sound Healing I had been attending.

Concept #3 – Stay positive and stay open! Open to opportunities from unexpected places, because they WILL be presented to you.

Immediately I asked, “Can I make a living at it? I mean, will I be able to make a living at that?”

She smugly replied, “That’s up to you.” (Damn, I hate when people tell me what I am supposed to already know.)

Concept #4– Believe in your abilities! Chances are, if you are drawn to doing something, it resonates with you…and YOU will resonate with IT!

Not two weeks later, it was our final certification class for Holographic Sound Healing. As I looked around the room to everyone paired up and working with each other, I noticed how very different they were than my randomly selected partner and me. Well, not really randomly selected, everyone else just paired up and left us to work with each other.  My partner’s name was Janet and she had an aura about her; One of strength, power, and certainty.  She held a serious expression, almost stern and unapproachable. She is one of those people that seem to have a secret knowledge, that ‘has it all figured out’ and if you get close enough, she may share the secret of life with you…or she might just kick your ass.  In short, she was a tough read, but she definitely exhibited strength. I think there may have been an intimidation factor felt by the other folks in the class, but I was not bright enough to pick up on it. These people must have known something to just leave us to each other, but she was the only other zaftig, long-haired, wild-bohemian looking person in the group, so of course I was immediately drawn to her!

So here we are. The last day of this amazing six month training and we are exhibiting all that we have learned. We are paired up; positions chosen and we are ready to go. Janet and I were talking a little bit which delayed our start, so everyone began toning before we did. I thought to myself, “Darn it, I am already a few steps behind. Okay, quiet yourself, find your center, there are all these steps you have to go thru in preparation before you begin the actual toning process, and you were talking thru it! Okay, get it together, don’t lose focus…” And while I was trying to quiet myself and go thru these very important steps to ‘get connected’, I found it extremely difficult, as all I could focus on was the other pairs toning to one another already.  That horrible voice in my head, a.k.a. FEAR says, “Ugh, they are already waaayyyy ahead of you. You better hurry up. Get thru the steps, quick, hurry, get connected!” (Yeah, that was helpful.) The more I tried to focus on myself to quiet my mind, the more I could only hear them all toning. But it didn’t seem like toning, it sounded more like singing. I wondered, “Who are they singing for?” They were all aspiring to sound so angelic and lovely. Hitting these very soft high notes, lilting their way to Spirit and a higher connection. Individually, they were charming. But putting them all in the same room with each other, and hearing it all at once, I mean, these beautiful, open people were all being so serious and trying to sound so ‘pretty’ that for some reason, it just made me giggle a little out loud. Then I realized that I had just giggled out loud. I thought, “Oh no.”

To self, C’mon Tala, don’t laugh. That would be extremely inappropriate and simply wrong. I mean, these people paid good money, studied for months and are trying their best to perform this culmination of cultivated experience and spiritual expression. They are all such lovely people. Whatever you do…don’t laugh.

Side note: I am not sure how you would spell it, but do you know that outward snort sound; the one that is made when you are trying to repress a cough, or a sneeze, or… a laugh? Yeah, that’s what came out next. I looked at the two faces closest to Janet and me, and they were being polite by continuing their vocal toning and attempting to hide the horror at my faux pas. “Oh no, they heard me.” I was mortified.  Here I am, trying to make an impression on the instructor, be at the top of my class, respect and honor my fellow Sound Healers, truly connect with Spirit and the Hathors, and I cannot hold it together for the life of me. I looked to Janet expecting her to show an expression of disapproval, but it was worse. Her complexion was all red, her eyes were filled with sparks and her face was contorted. I thought I had awakened a dragon, and then it came…

 Both of us just burst out giggling. There was no hiding it. Bear in mind, the next pair of people were only 6 feet away from us! And the more we tried to control it, the worse it got. Janet’s laugh went from a giggle to flat out guffawing; I went from guffawing to a high pitched squeal! We laughed so hard and so loud that we were both crying. I could not control the fact that my tongue was sticking out of my mouth and I was drooling! It was awful, and I thought to myself, “This is AWFUL! How disrespectful! These poor people, what they must think of me? Us?” That just made it worse. For ten straight minutes, we were laughing-crying-laughing. It got to the point that we completely shut down the other people trying to tone, they were so thrown off by our uproarious cackles they just stopped toning altogether and waited for us to stop. For Janet and me, it just added proverbial fuel to the hysterical fire! We got to the point where we just stopped caring and went with it.  At the end of it all, where there began two strong, somewhat stoic women on a sweet, velvet settee, was now a sloppy, drool and tear ridden, embarrassed lump of two bodies flopped over each other, gasping for air.

Once we wiped ourselves off, straightened our clothing, blew our noses and composed ourselves as best we could; it was time to face everyone. At this point we both figured we blew it. We could see in their eyes that they were waiting for a cue from the instructor, Randeane, on how to react. One thing seemed to be a general consensus, Janet and I were now thought of as ‘The Bad Girls of Holographic Sound Healing’, but gosh, it felt SO GOOD! Janet and I actually thanked each other.  A huge weight had evaporated and all the fear and concern and worry about everything in the world was just lifted and transmuted. So, bring it on. We feared nothing! We felt AMAZING! We were glowing!

Randeane came over to us and announced to the class, “Now THAT was Sound Healing!”

In that one statement, everyone was given permission to laugh! And we all did, together. But Janet and I did not get off that easy. Randeane put us on the spot to actually tone in front of everyone. We were depleted of all fear; we were in sheer joy and audacity at that moment and just went with it. What came out was more powerful than anyone in that room expected, especially us!  

Concept #5– Don’t edit your joyful self!  Do what brings you joy! Be in the moment of joy!

After we surprised ourselves, Janet turned to me and said, “We are going to work together”.

Within two weeks, Sacred Alignment was conceived. Within a month we were performing individual healing sessions and within two months we were conducting group sound healing meditations. We have been steadily booked at our convenience out of several locations ever since!

Concept #6 – Set your intentions when you are in a positive state of mind. (Refer back to #1 & $2)

I am not saying that changing our ways of thinking are always easy. And yes, we all can have low energy days, needs for release; times when we want to run and hide under the covers. Do not beat yourself up if you are subject to especially low energy and need to cry on someone’s shoulder or go into your cave. It is important to honor that time as well. But remember that you are in control.

Concept #7 – Be energetically responsible. Honor your needs, but put effort into caring for yourself and not sucking your friends and family dry of their energetic resources. They may not be there when you need them next time.

Concept #8– Do not beat yourself up for not being perfect. Think of yourself as an artist, everything you do is art. Some people might just not understand the concept yet.

Well, I am happy to report that it is almost 7 years later and I’ve been working as a spiritual practitioner professionally ever since. I am a successful sound healer and energy worker, and I have had the pleasure and honor of helping so many people solve their problems every day by working in a metaphysical bookstore where I get to offer books, stones, candles, spells, and advice to help people along their path. A New Page in Middletown Connecticut has been my home into my home base for my practice and my day job, where Yvette Page has been one of my best teachers and closest friends. I opened up to the universe and I was truly blessed! 

Concept #9 Remember to count your blessings!

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About the Author:

Tala is a healer of multi-cultural decent and influence. Her heritage is a mixture of Celtic, African, Native American and European decent. However, her spiritual journey began when she and her mother were living throughout Mexico. While exploring one of our world’s ‘Sacred Power Spots’, Chichen Itza in the Yucatan, Tala was struck by a bus and was pronounced dead. She was revived when three indigenous Mayan Shamans appeared from the jungle and proceeded to pass her body between them and chant. They brought her to their hidden jungle village on the mountain to recover and heal for three days. When Tala emerged from the jungle on the fourth day, she told her mother’s companion that she had been “given the light of god by the Mayan people”. She was five years old when she experienced this N.D.E. (near death experience). This opened the door to her receiving messages and visitations from spirits to this day.

At age 23, Tala was the recipient of Shaktipat, in person directly from Shri Anandi Ma. This is a transmission of energy/ god force through (in her case) physical touch which awakens the Kundalini. It often sets the person on their true spiritual path. Many who receive Shaktipat become healers and teachers.

Over the years, combined with her continuing formal education, she has maintained a balance between the physical sciences and the metaphysical. She was one of the first 60 people in the U.S. to be sent to the Johnson Space Center in Houston, TX to be trained by NASA to educate local teachers about the International Space Station in its beginning stages. She became an R.C. Counselor, Peer Counselor, and an Ordained Minister for the Universal Life Church. She is a Certified Holographic Sound Healer and is a Reiki Practitioner. This year she has become an ordained Minister and Reverend of Our Lord & Lady of the Trinacrian Rose Church and has completed her 2 year apprenticeship in the Pachakuti Mesa Cross-cultural Shamanism and is now a Paco-Shaman. She has made her living for the past years as a powerful energy worker/healer of individuals and groups and a master craftsman of ritual, ceremonial and energetic tools. Her dream is to travel the world and continue her formal and spiritual education with scholars, locals and indigenous peoples.

Tala is a Spiritual Practitioner of the Shamanic arts, she studies Ancient Spiritualities from all over the world and she is a Sacred Toolsmith making tools for Shamans, Pagans and Energy Workers. You can find her at ‘A New Page’ at 1060 Newfield St., Middletown, CT

You can find the shop’s Facebook page at:

Www.facebook.com/anewpagestore For updates and upcoming events, meditations, classes, talks, Fire & Drum Circles and Fairs!

 

Finding Your Own Way

April, 2018

Chapter One in Our New Serialization…

Basic Relaxation Techniques


Relax!

A certain amount of tension is necessary for our lives. In fact, it is essential! Life requires tension, – as does every enjoyable activity that we can indulge in. There is a joy in handling even simple everyday tasks. There is a sense of achievement in pushing the limits of our strength, speed and endurance.

Even fear can be positive. It prepares us for action and helps us to think faster and act decisively in a crisis. Then, we relax. Everything rests and we return to a normal level of tension.

Or, at least we should.

Many of us don’t. We live in fear. What will my partner say if I work late again? What will my boss do if I do not finish this job in time? What if I fail this exam? What if I cannot pay my bills?

Childhood fears remain below the level of awareness. For some, the fear of hell-fire, or, perhaps separation or maybe the bogeyman that we imagined to be under the bed.

Unexamined childhood fears and traumas cause much of our feeling of unease and feed our tendency to worry about the future. I have noticed that people often feel an emotion first, and then, look around them for a cause to ascribe it to later. We justify our feelings by blaming the people and situations around us. As a result, we cannot fully trust our own judgement until we learn to relax and become more aware of our own habitual feelings.

This first exercise is probably the longest one in the book, – but it quickly becomes streamlined with practice. Just by learning to relax for a short period, we can begin to realize what a normal level of tension should be. Regular practice will quickly allow us to relax at our own command.

The effects are far-reaching, – allowing us to gain control of many situations in which we were previously at the mercy of our emotions, and the manipulation of others. It is also the first step in effective meditation.

Basic Relaxation

This exercise is best carried out, initially, in a lying down position. With practice, it can then be done sitting down. After a while, the reader will be able to relax totally in most situations with a single simple command to relax. A walk in the woods can become a healing meditation.

In the first attempts at relaxing, there is a risk that the reader may fall into a deep, healing sleep.

Make sure that there are no candles burning, or anything that may become a hazard should you do so. Also make sure that you are warm, comfortable and are not going to be disturbed. Turn off your mobile phone and inform anyone in the house that you are unavailable for a while. Wear loose comfortable clothing. Lie flat on your back in a comfortable place. Feel free to use a pillow if it is more comfortable.

Take a deep breath.

As you breathe in, tense your whole body.

Breathe out and say “Relax” in your mind as you let go of the tension.

Breathe in and tense… Breathe out and relax.

Breathe in and tense …. Breathe out and relax.

Repeat this a few more times. Each time, tell yourself to “Relax!”

Allow yourself to breathe slowly and easily

Now turn your attention to your body, starting at your toes.

Wriggle your toes and tense them. Then tell them to relax as you let go of the tension.

Then relax your feet. First one foot, then the other foot, then both feet at the same time.

Tense and relax.

Then your calves, each one, then both. Then tense from the tip of your toes to your calves and relax.

Work your way up to your thighs. Tense and relax.

Again, become aware of your body from your toes to your thighs and tell yourself to “relax!”

Work your way up your torso. Tense and relax.

Then up to your shoulders and down your arms.

Wriggle your fingers, then tense and relax.

Pay careful attention to your neck muscles. Tense and relax.

Then the back of your head, tense and relax.

Then become aware of your facial muscles. Tense and relax.

Then focus on your forehead and the top of your head.

Take a deep breath and tense your whole body.

Then, as you exhale say “Relax!”

Just let everything go.

By this time, you should feel very heavy as if you were melting into the surface beneath you.

Repeat a few times, depending on the time available.

This simple exercise often results in discovering hidden attitudes and fears which are held in the muscles as “memories”. It does this by releasing the habitual tension that holds the energies in place in our bodies. Regular practice can loosen the grip of unconscious negative expectations on our health and interactions with others. I would recommend keeping a diary and noting any dreams or reveries as well as day to day events.

I would also recommend practicing this until it becomes streamlined, before moving on to any of the other meditations.

***

About the Author:

Finding Your Own Way by Patrick W Kavanagh

Featuring the inspirational art of Bill Oliver

Click Image for Amazon Information

Writer, poet, Patrick W Kavanagh was born in Dublin and now lives and works in Lincolnshire in a small rural town. Patrick became fascinated by the strange abilities of the human mind from watching his mother give psychic readings using tea-leaves and playing cards. With a lifelong interest in metaphysics and parapsychology, he has given tarot and spirit readings for over 40 years. He travels to many events with his wife Tina, exploring the power of shamanic drumming to heal, and induce therapeutic trance states. They also hold a regular drumming circle in the picturesque Lincolnshire Wolds.

Also available at most retailers by Patrick W Kavanagh

Kiara

Distant Shores

From the Muse

Hypnobirthing: Letting Go of Fear

November, 2017

 

I’m 37 weeks pregnant as I write this, and there’s a very real possibility I may need to go into hospital to have my labour induced as early as next week. I am suffering from some wildly fluctuating blood pressure, which appears (thankfully) to have no clear pathological source, other than the pain I am in from SPD. SPD is symphysis pubis dysfunction; a condition whereby the ligaments supporting the pelvis and pubic bones soften too early and too much, so that these bones are able to grind together, causing agonising pain. I don’t really sleep properly anymore, and of course, can’t take anything but the mildest painkillers.

I was already worried about the labour, as the labour with my first child was quite traumatic and painful, and even though I know, I know I absolutely can do it, creeping anxieties have hooked their way into my mind like poison ivy, sending shoots of doubt to shatter my confidence in my own body’s abilities.

With this in mind, my community midwife referred me to a mental health midwife; a fantastic woman who visits me periodically to make sure I’ve not gone around the twist, and to offer what help and support she can. It was this midwife who first told me about hypnobirthing, something I had not come across before.

In the UK, we have the National Health Service, which means that most of our healthcare needs are paid for by taxes and national insurance payments, meaning healthcare is free at the point of use. Hypnobirthing is not widely available on the NHS, although it is available through some private healthcare providers. It turns out I am lucky enough to be in one of the areas in the UK that is trying to change that; to make this mindful approach to pregnancy and labour available for free on the NHS to those who might benefit. The scheme I became a member of is a pilot scheme, intended to try out the techniques and show the benefits they have, ahead of any potential rollout of the scheme for the wider public.

So what are the techniques? Basically, hypnobirthing sessions are a form of guided meditation, similar to pathworking. A fully qualified midwife leads the sessions, and a small group of us gets as comfy as we can with our huge bumps, and the lights are dimmed and relaxing music is played. Our midwife talks us gently down into a meditative state, talking us through focusing on our own breath, our own bodies, and reinforcing the connection to the baby (or babies) growing inside us. We envisage the air we breathe in as healing, golden light, filling us up and relaxing us completely. She counts down and repeat the word ‘relax’ at intervals, encouraging us to relax our muscles as much as possible each time we hear the trigger word. The idea is that, with repetition, we can learn to relax ourselves and enter this meditative state at will, for example, during labour and the increasing intensity of contractions.

My first session is a little late in the programme, due to an administrative error in the first instance, and the fact that I had to repeatedly visit hospital for blood pressure checks when my other sessions were booked! So frustratingly, I’ve only been left with two sessions I can attend before the arrival of our wee one. However, the midwife leading the course has also provided us (via Dropbox, very modern) with MP3s so we can practice the relaxation techniques at home.

I spoke to one of the other women who has been doing the course since it started. She suffers from lupus and had many anxieties about pregnancy and labour. This is her first baby, yet she now seems more confident to carry her baby than I am with my second! She calmly explains to me how she does the relaxation exercises every night, and has even found similar exercises for her birth partner, to help them be relaxed and supportive during the delivery of the baby. We talk about setting the mood with soft lamplight, and the midwife reminds us we can take a lamp or fairy-lights into the hospital with us to help recreate the mood of our relaxation space. This was news to me, as my delivery room with Nathan had been a sterile, blank walled affair that I had no idea I could try and make my own. This is definitely something I am keeping in mind for my trip to hospital!

 

 

This early on in my own experience of hypnobirthing, all I can say for certain is that I am enjoying the meditations and visualisations, which include taking off a heavy rucksack and pulling out the items, which symbolise fears or anxieties, and dumping them into a hot air balloon which flies far away with them. A sickle represented my fear of the pain. A black rock covered in shards of glass represented my needle phobia (a very real problem when you might have to have a cannula during labour!) and finally, a damp, torn bit of tissue represented my own lack of confidence in my body’s ability to do what it has been designed (in part; not solely) to do.

Waking up’ from the hypnobirthing sessions is like coming out of a deep sleep, but one where you can remember all the details of every dream you had, and one where you retain the benefits of every positive feeling and affirmation you experienced. I can’t say at this stage whether I will be able to focus on the relaxation techniques once the stress of actual labour kicks in, but I do feel more confident, and even being able to relax now, at this stage, with more hospital and ante-natal appointments looming, is a great benefit indeed.

One of the major benefits I have felt so far is the ability to use the ‘3, 2, 1… relax’ technique to lower anxiety about moving in bed, which had become a bit of a nightmare thanks to the SPD, due to my pelvis displacing during the night. The ability to relax and not be so tense prior to the inevitable ‘clunk’ of my pelvis moving back into its intended position has helped wonders, particularly in getting back to sleep after those middle of the night toilet trips!

Next month I’ll be able to write you the natural follow up piece; did it work? With one more midwife led session to go, I will know a bit more about the techniques involved, and will very soon be able to put them into real practice. In another city, where the scheme was rolled out some time back, the number of natural births has increased, and the number of births requiring little or no pain relief has also increased, and the average time for a baby to be delivered has dropped dramatically, which is very encouraging. Less medical intervention means less stress for mothers and therefore less stress for baby, which can only ever be a good thing. I’ll let you know how it works out for me.

 

*Hot Air Balloon, Copyright Kirsten Savage 2017, reproduction not permitted. Photo copyright Mabh Savage 2016.

 

***

 

About the Author:

 

Mabh Savage is a Pagan author, poet and musician, as well as a freelance journalist.

She is the author of A Modern Celt: Seeking the Ancestors and Pagan Portals: Celtic Witchcraft.

Follow Mabh on TwitterFacebook and her blog.


 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The Spiralled Edge

December, 2015

Spiralled Edge: The Face of Fear

We are being asked and told too many times in life right now to be afraid. Afraid of other people, afraid of our governments, afraid of religions, afraid of doctors striking, afraid of… well, everything. And those fears keep us from questioning the validity of what we are being told is truth. They keep us from realising who or what is an enemy and who isn’t.

Fear of being in a car accident keeps some people from driving, others it helps them to drive with greater awareness of potential dangers and hazards around them.

Fear of being attacked keeps some people from leaving their home, others it helps them to be more aware of their surroundings, and of the need to keep from going in to some situations.

Fear, I know, is a tool that I can use to keep me safe as I go through life. As a tool though I must make sure that I am using it and that it is not controlling me, or being used to control me.

 

spiral

 

Fear is what causes people to lash out in anger, or freezes them into non-action. Fear makes us hate others who are different: different race, different religion, different economic background, or different nationality. Fears create enemies.

Every day, I can make a choice to allow my life and my actions to be controlled by fears, or I can choose to use fear as a helpful tool in keeping me safe from harm.

I choose to not live in fear. I choose to not be afraid of Others. I choose to not be controlled by fear.

Recently, I did some shamanic healing work to meet an inner fear. My Sacred Garden is a place within the Otherworlds where I go to study, to meet with Guides, to do healing work, and to ask questions. Here, I stated my desire to meet with a fear which was holding me back in life.

I was taken to an old, dark foreboding house. Inside, it was equally as dark and damp and I was led into the middle of a room. From the corners and between the cracks in the walls came hundreds of tiny spiders. Now, I am not as a rule afraid of creepy crawlies, but even I was a bit taken aback by the sheer number that I saw coming towards me.

All of those tiny spiders came together to create a single human-like creature. Each of those spiders represented a tiny little fear that I held. Individually they were fairly insubstantial and could be easily dealt with. Together though… together, they created a monster. When I would think about facing my inner fears, I didn’t see the hundreds of tiny fears, I saw a huge insurmountable Fear. By looking at the individual fears however in this shamanic healing work, I have discovered that they really aren’t so big or so scary.

And because these internal fears aren’t so scary any more, the outer world isn’t quite so scary either.

What fears within are holding you back?

Image credit: 1971 Walt Kelly, Pogo comic strip

Musings of a Massachusetts Witch

June, 2013

Living In Fear of the Monster

 

It has occurred to me that the majority of our society here in The United States live in a constant vibration of fear that they are not even aware of. Perhaps they just flat out deny that they are scared or perhaps they justify their feelings and manipulate their thoughts so that the fear appears to be a logical thought and not a fear at all. But what is there to be afraid of? I mean we live in The United States of America. Wasn’t this country built on the idea of freedom? We as citizens have a plethora of civil liberties such as: freedom of speech, religion, expression, press, assembly, privacy, due process, among others; so what in the world do we have to be afraid of? We are afraid of what every other human being is afraid of regardless of what country or culture that individual is born into. We are afraid of that which we do not understand.

 

Our shared fear manifests differently for each country or culture. For some this may manifest as war while for others in a different country it may look like sex and sexuality or bear the face of Satan. But for us, here in The US, the young, impatient, charming country that possesses everything it desires … what does that fear look like when we look under the bed at night? What is it we see lurking just beyond our reach? What is it that would motivate us to commit such violent acts: setting off a bomb in a crowd of thousands, stoning our sisters and daughters to death in the middle of the village or flying a passenger airplane into busy populated building on a Tuesday morning?

 

Each US citizen will proudly tell you that we are not afraid of anything and that “we won’t back down”. But I propose that this statement is a lie or at least a self-deception. We are afraid. We handle this fear with what we may label courage. Instead of waiting and being on the defensive we would rather risk it all and fight offensively. We as a society would rather stick our arm under the bed and grab that monster by the tail instead of waiting for it to attack us first. This move gives us the advantage, right? Honestly, I disagree. If we continuously live our lives based on the possibility of what might happen we are allowing fear to control us even if we convince ourselves that our actions are proactive. Those actions are responses to a possible situation which itself is a reaction to a fear.

 

For example: you believe that a monster is lurking under your bed at night. Your best friend, who has proven to have experience with nighttime monsters, believes that because your sister had a monster in her closet and you live in the same house it elevates your risk of having a monster under your bed (It has been discovered that monsters seem to appear in multiple rooms of one residence). Other friends in the neighborhood who had their bedrooms arranged the same way you do, who also had a sister with a monster in her closet, discovered they had a monster lurking under their bed. Your best friend informs you that you have an 87 percent chance that a monster is lurking under your bed and a 50 percent chance of having a monster in your closet.

 

Do you consider what these numbers truly mean before you take any action? They are a reflection of only a portion of the neighborhood population studied by your best friend. They are by no means a guarantee that you will be one of the 87 or 50 percent with a monster. After receiving this information, you decide to be proactive and remove the bed from your room replacing it with an air mattress. You also consider removing your closet door – just in case. You acted proactively. You believe that the risk of having a monster lurking under your bed is greatly reduced and you feel safe, secure and unafraid. But are you still living in fear or have you truly removed it from your life?

 

While I would agree that it is your room, your furniture and your life and that you have the ability to do whatever it is you want with it as long as it doesn’t impede on mine in any way. I personally am not comfortable living in such a state of fear where the only way I feel safe and secure is to remove furniture from my room. I would look for other options: rearrange my bedroom, hang a pentacle on my wall or sleep with a flashlight.  I believe that monsters appear in our lives when other aspects of our well-being is compromised. The monsters manifest physically when something energetically is not aligned and most especially when we are living in the vibration of fear. I believe that we can eliminate the lurking monsters by finding balance and harmony within and by aligning ourselves with our Authentic Self we enable ourselves to experience our True Will. At that moment there will be no need to attack the monster under the bed because for you it won’t exist.

Musings of a Massachusetts Witch

August, 2012

Love, Fear and Action

 

My husband and I had an interesting conversation the other day concerning fear, love and action. The question that we discussed was this: What motivates an individual into action?

 

A few definitions are needed here in order to understand this discussion.

 

What we mean by fear is any thought or vibration that is a negative emotion – a resistance to what is truly desired. Some emotions that correspond to fear are: anger, confusion, disappointment, vulnerability, unworthiness and guilt. These are examples of fear manifesting within our life experience.

 

What we mean my love is any thought or vibration that is a positive emotion – an alignment with that which we truly desire. Some emotions that correspond to love are: joy, understanding, contentment, calmness, happiness and delight. These are examples of love manifesting within our life experience. Our natural instinct is to know and live in the vibration of love.

 

What we mean by action is any physical movement towards a specific goal.

 

My husband suggested that for an individual to be motivated into action there needs to be an equal balance of fear and love. That the person has a fear of a specific circumstance and they choose something they love in order to be motivated to ‘do’ something concerning the fear. For example: an individual enjoys music (vibration of love) but he is feeling discontentment (vibration of fear) with his life. It is then the love and fear combined that motivates the individual to create (action) music.

 

While I agreed with the basic concept of this I felt there was a piece of the equation missing.  I disagreed with the thought that there needed to be an equal balance between fear and love. Perhaps it is an abundance of one or the other than motivates. Consider for a moment, the vibrational spectrum. On one end we have fear and on the other we have love. As we experience life on this physical plane of existence we fluctuate within this spectrum between the two vibrations. Sometimes we experience more fear than love and other times we feel more love than fear and even other circumstances we may even hit the balance but to conclude that at that moment of balance is when we are motivated into action, well, I just don’t agree.

 

What if there was another component involved in motivation? What about desire? What about Will? How does this affect an individual’s action, if at all?

 

As an individual experiences life fluctuating between fear and love, which I believe is necessary to living in a physical manifestation, action is determined by Will to manifest a specific vibrational frequency. Physical movement would depend on the strength of the individual’s Will. If the individual has a weak Will then there would be little or no movement. No action. Although even as I type this out I believe that no action is still action. If the individual has a powerful Will then the action would be greater and more successful in manifesting their desire. This would mean that an individual aligning on the vibrational spectrum of fear and love with a strong Will would manifest that which they are most aligned with. If this individual has more fear than love they would be manifesting the desire motivated by this alignment. For example: an individual is worried (vibration of fear) about the lack of money but he enjoys music (vibration of love) so he creates (action) music with the desire (Will) to make money.

 

If the individual has more love than fear they would be manifesting the desire motivated by that alignment. For example: an individual enjoys the company of people (vibration of love) but she sees that society is generally in a state of discontentment (vibration of fear) so she shares (action) personal experiences with the desire (Will) to teach others how to find personal happiness.

 

After the contemplation on this concept I suggested that for an individual to be motivated into action there needs to be a strong Will along with both the vibration of fear and love. What do you think?

The Crowe’s Nest

August, 2011

We have all had it at one point in time where we are doing something and all of a sudden we feel paralyzed with being overwhelmed, fear, trepidation, etc. That over all anxiety for some situation that makes us not wish to go any further in the direction we had chosen. Sometimes, it is so overpowering, that we lock ourselves up in our homes and wish that we don’t ever have to leave again.

Anxiety is the number one mental illness in America, even surpassing depression now. So many people are scared to leave their homes because of the “chance” something detrimental will happen to them. Over forty million people over the age of eighteen suffer from some form of anxiety. Sometimes, it can be so debilitating that a person cannot leave their home, eat in a public place, or even go to school functions with their children.

When I was eighteen, I was one of those people. I had a severe case of Anthropophobia- fear of people. I couldn’t walk into a room without having the overwhelming sense that they were all making fun of me or didn’t like me. I was always running from rooms and leaving areas because of it. It was hard to work, go to school, and let’s not even mention eating out at a restaurant with my husband. My family thought it so bad that they actually had me hospitalized to try to treat me.

The hospital, in its wonderful wisdom, put me into group therapy. Can you imagine? I was forced to sit in a circle with a group of people who in my opinion thought I was crazy. They thought I was a lunatic and they wanted to plot against me to hurt me to get me out of the group. Needless to say, that was not the proper treatment for me.

They put me on medicine to help with my anxiety. I was taking a medicine that when they gave me my first dose they said, “If you don’t kill anyone in the first two weeks, you will be fine.” I am sure that the person giving out the medicine thought it was a dandy joke, but to me, this was my life. I couldn’t function to make a decent life for myself, and she thought this was just some kind of “retreat.”

Being a mother, I am constantly battling with myself to keep my kids safe, but not be so overprotective that they do not have a life of their own. It took me some time, but I worked my way though my disorder. I still have fights with it on occasion, but I am much better.  I have made friends, work with a great group of people for a meet-up, and am even working on starting to teach others about paganism. I actually can stand in front of a group of people and speak, though I have been told that the nervousness rushes off me like heat from flames. But these things are things that at eighteen were nothing close to what I would ever think I would be able to do with my life.

I have learned a few things though about my anxiety. I have also found that I am not the only one. Just in the last two weeks I have found two others that are like me, though I think they still have some work to do. I wanted to help them out with their issues, as well as work on my own a little more, so I started doing research.

One thing I learned is that passion flower was once used as a folk remedy for insomnia and anxiety. It can be used in a tea with black Irish tea and valerian root to calm the nerves. It has been good and causes less drowsiness than medication that is given regularly for anxiety.

There are also stones that you can carry that will help the body work the anxiety out. Aquamarine is a beautiful blue stone and easy to find in rings as it is the birthstone of March. Aventurine is always a good choice as well. Picasso marble, rhodonite and schorl can also calm anxiety. Green moss agate, which is easy to find and very beautiful, can also be carried around to help with it.

It is always good to mediate and perhaps do yoga. It causes you to have the ability to ground yourself in situations where you feel overwhelmed. Even simple exercises that you do on a daily basis would help. It causes endorphins to enter your bloodstream which help balance you out and makes people happy. We will never forget Elle Wood’s on Legally Blond, “Exercise gives you endorphins. Endorphins make you happy. Happy people just don’t shoot their husbands, they just don’t.”

One of the worst problems I have is my endless cycle with soda. I get stressed, I reach for my faithful friend Dr. Pepper or Coca Cola and down it goes. With that being said, caffeine should be on your no-no list if you are prone to anxiety. It does not help you at all, even though I know I feel much better. Problem with it is, it doesn’t let you sleep, which causes you to lay awake and worry even more about the issues that are bothering you. Instead of reaching for that ever faithful soda, or that extra coffee, reach for chamomile tea instead. It will help your body relax and drift off to sleep.

Upon my research, I was told about something that I found very interesting. Someone told me about “Worry time.” It is thirty minutes a day you set aside to just worry. You use that time, and that time only, to sit and worry about your problems. If you find yourself harping on a particular issue at a different time, just remind yourself that you have set time aside for that, and it isn’t the time right now.

My last suggestion is lavender salt baths. Lavender calms you. Baths have been known to cause you to relax and distress. So take that time, run you a tub of warm water and sit and soak your troubles away. The smell from the lavender as well as the water will help your body in so many ways that your mental state will learn to relax too.

Now, I am not saying that all these things will make you 100% cured. I can’t say that I am even cured that much, but it will help. I do want to share something with you though. A lot of anxiety, at least in my life, is from me. I don’t share my issues. I don’t reach out to those that love me and try to unwind by asking for help, or even by letting them know what is bothering me. I have always believed that my strife is for me to deal with and there is no reason to bother anyone else with it. But simply put, that is beyond stupid. I am only hurting me in that sense. The people that love us, they are there to help us, confide in us, love us, and protect us when they can. Not letting them into our little world, it only hurts us more. We already have way too much in life to handle, and that is why the Goddess brings them into our lives. She knows we need others to survive. We were started by living in a village, and unfortunately we have gone too far into being a solitary family unit that our village aspect is no longer in effect. We do have family and loved ones though and they want us to be there for many years. Don’t push them away, but open your mind and hearts to them. Even stubborn women like me can learn to do that.

Many blessings to you all my readers. I hope that my suggestions in here help you on your way to leading very open and productive lives. Remember, relax and breathe. Take one day at a time, and tomorrow will seem like a breeze.