good bye

Nelland Living

March, 2015

Sharing the Wealth

A confession: I have never done voluntary work. Also I am not a fan of donating money for charity. Especially in the past three years, while I´ve been a stay-at-home-mom (with virtually no paycheck).

On the other hand I try to spread positivity and help those people I know, or meet, if any way I can. I have also donated hair for those in need, and my old clothes and household ware for charity.

Once before Christmas at my work, they collected toys and books to be given as presents to poor families´ children. “How sweet and thoughtful!” I figured. Until I read the note further… They only accepted brand new stuff, still in packages! What the heck? If you´re genuinely in need, you will be exhilarated to receive a teddy bear someone else has gently hugged before you, or a story book someone else has already read through a few times. I know I was as a kid! And so are my children now. They don´t mind getting recycled bicycles or shoes from friend and relatives. And we are an average income family, not really short of anything essential. What´s with the world? Is our time, especially after and during these years of recession, still floating in excess, so that the only thing we can appreciate is continuously getting something new, brand new?

I ended up “donating” nothing for those “poor” kids. But despite of my anarchy, they received loads of gifts nonetheless, so don´t worry.  =)

  This March will change my life dramatically. I will be returning to work after taking care of my kids at home for three years. I´m one of those lucky people who has a job to return to.
  My kids are still small, and I feel like my presence at home is more valuable now than ever. Also at the same time there are more unemployed people out there in the market than usually, thanks to the recession still. I figured I can do common good for both by working only four days a week. That way I can be there for my kids more, not feel like I´m in a rat race, and offer someone else a share of my paycheck. In fact, when talking to my boss about it, she happily announced that by my 20% share we are then able to employ a whole new person full-time! There are other part-timers, and together we can make it happen. How awesome is that?! I´m glad to pinch off those extra bucks in exchange for more free time. It´s a win-win situation, like they say.

Planting fruit trees and setting up vegetable gardens in third world countries is close to my heart. I wish those people could have enough to eat, and be responsible, and masters, of their own survival. In the future I hope to be able to aid in this, one way or another. But that will have to wait until my kids have flown out of the nest, and I am no longer needed at home.

  Other things at the top of my priority list are girls´ access to school in “undeveloped” countries, and naturally green living to keep Earth alive. Every step counts, from recycling to reducing electricity consumption to financial support of environmental foundations aiming to “save the planet”.
  Luckily there are so many of us, so there are supporters for all causes. Not one man can do it all, but we can all do something to make this a happy place to live in. Wealth comes in many forms, not only money, so there is a way for us all to share it with those in need.
  Now I´m off to do my share of tax paying, and enabling work for someone else. It remains to be seen if I will still have the time to contribute to So until then, let´s enjoy the ride of everyday life and think positive! This planet is a fabulous place to live in, let´s keep it that way by sharing our wealth!
 Happy days!

Tink About It

January, 2015

Farewell to Kyra


On November 30th a wonderful woman passed over to the Summerlands. Kyra was my HPs, my initiator, but first and foremost she was a dear friend. Although most of you reading this didn’t know her, I want to share some stories and thoughts about her.


When I met her for the first time some years ago, she was already diagnosed with Hodgkin’s. It came back several times and even then she was already living on borrowed time. That didn’t stop her from fighting, on the contrary! She has been a fighter until the end. She tried alternative methods, special diets, everything within reach that looked promising. She has managed to live way longer than the medical world would think possible. It was hard on her, but she hardly ever complained. That wasn’t really in her nature and if she did she always tried to end the conversation on a positive note.


I met her on several occasions, mainly on events organised by the Pagan Federation in The Netherlands, but we had more in common than our pagan path and shared a lot of interests. We also kept in contact through e-mail, social media, etc. She was a gifted artist and very creative, although she was often trivialising it if I told her that. She shared her knowledge and ideas freely, always willing to explain something. We had talks about health and a body that didn’t cooperate with what we wanted. In that area I was the one trivialising, because I didn’t want to compare my health issues with her way more serious ones. Sometimes she was angry about that, but we also laughed a lot and didn’t take ourselves too serious!


Her pagan path started in shamanism and that stayed with her. We often talked about it. In the beginning I was studying with Phyllis Curott, who combines wicca and shamanistic techniques into her own tradition. Kyra was very interested and shared some of her own practices with me. Later on she met Ron, my husband, and they got along very good too. They shared the love of drumming and liked to drum together. When Ron and I made our own shaman drums from scratch, she promised to make drum bags for us by felting. Unfortunately she didn’t feel good enough to felt and wasn’t able to even start on them. Fortunately I have other felting objects and art she made.


After some not-so-nice experiences on my spiritual path I was questioning myself whether this really was the right path for me. I felt a bit lost. Kyra helped me to find myself and my path again. She never told me what I should do, but helped me to discover by myself how I really felt, how to deal with it and what I wanted. That was the kind of friend she was: never judgmental, always there to help. Oh sure, she had her own shadows to fight. She wasn’t perfect, no-one is, but we shared the ability to play the devil’s advocate, to see problems from different perspectives, not necessarily our own.

When I had found my way again, and decided that yes, this is definitely the right path for me, she invited me to join her coven after she discussed it with the other coven members. That was the final step I needed to take to get back on track. It is a Greencraft coven, an Alexandrian based traditional craft wiccan tradition. I was the last one she initiated, a bittersweet honour… Because of the coven our contact intensified, we met more often and I loved that. If only she could have had more time…


We knew she lived on borrowed time, but her death still came very fast and suddenly. I’m glad she didn’t have to suffer any longer, the pain is finally gone… May she rest in peace in the loving hands of the gods, they know she deserves it.

She had left instructions for her final goodbye. It was a private ceremony with people who cared about her very much. Beautiful, with tears of course, but we also celebrated her life just like she wanted. She was (is!) loved and will be dearly missed by many…


She wasn’t someone for ostentation, didn’t like to be the centre of attention, let alone admiration, but I really wanted to share this, so I hope she’ll forgive me…

RIP, Kyra – merry meet, merry part, until we merry meet again!

Elegy for a Dead Witch

(by Doreen Valiente)

To think that you are gone, over the crest of the hills,
As the Moon passed from her fullness, riding the sky,
And the White Mare took you with her.
To think that we will wait another life
To drink wine from the horns and leap the fire.
Farewell from this world, but not from the Circle.
That place that is between the worlds
Shall hold return in due time. Nothing is lost.
The half of a fruit from the tree of Avalon
Shall be our reminder, among the fallen leaves
This life treads underfoot. Let the rain weep,
Waken in sunlight from the Realms of Sleep.