{"id":10576,"date":"2015-01-01T01:10:17","date_gmt":"2015-01-01T06:10:17","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/paganpages.org\/content\/?p=10960"},"modified":"2014-12-29T13:46:07","modified_gmt":"2014-12-29T18:46:07","slug":"dear-jules-2","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/paganpages.org\/emagazine\/2015\/01\/01\/dear-jules-2\/","title":{"rendered":"Dear Jules"},"content":{"rendered":"

Hello Jules,<\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n

I would really like to know how to let go. Let go of sadness, anger, any\/all negativity. Thank you for your time.<\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n

Letting Go<\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n

Dear Letting Go,<\/em><\/p>\n

I think that acceptance plays a big part on the road to letting go.\u00a0 Our lives feel lighter and more manageable when we take the time to accept ourselves, our lives, our pasts, presents and futures, our fears, anger, negativity and positive emotions as well.\u00a0 I think it is important especially to take the time to accept the current situation that we are dealing with.\u00a0 Through acceptance we are able to let go of the things that weigh us down.<\/em><\/p>\n

Joseph Campbell said \u201cWe must be willing to let go of the life we\u2019ve planned, so as to have the life that is waiting for us.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

Blessings,<\/em><\/p>\n

Jules<\/em><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Dear Jules,<\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n

My daughter & her b\/f have been staying with my hubby & me for 6 months. They give us $250 a month for staying. We’ve gotten behind on bills. It’s catching up with us. We just bought this home in May & we were delinquent on our payment this month. Our water bill was late. They run the heater downstairs full blast\u2026 The toilet needs\u2026 is leaking & running all the time. They didn’t tell us. We had to figure it out. So we told them to shut the water off to the toilet.\u00a0 There’s 2 more bathrooms upstairs but they still use that one. They turn the water on to it & forget to turn it back off\u2026<\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n

I’ve told them repeatedly to stop all of these things. They leave lights on when not home\u2026 They both get a few dollars food stamps a month but when they go grocery shopping it’s all for them downstairs.<\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n

… Last time I went with her she got a car full & out of that 3 bags went upstairs yet I cook everyday & they eat our food. So, my hubby gave them 2 weeks to decide. Pay 1\/2 utilities,\u00a0 cable, & 1\/2 of all groceries & they don’t have to pay the $250 a month rent so really it won’t cost too much extra.<\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n

She got smart with me & said none of it is their fault\u2026 our light bill is way up, groceries times 2 because there’s 2 extra people to feed, & from the leaking our water bill was $130 this month which I barely got paid before they turned it off.<\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n

My hubby puts in a lot of hours at work & we’re not making it all the while they’re getting a roof over their heads, cable, internet, water, lights, Netflix, food, etc. They have 2 weeks to decide on paying 1\/2 on what we ask or get their own place.<\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n

They act as though we’re kicking them out when clearly we told them we are not! They can stay\u2026<\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n

My daughter refuses to talk to her Dad about anything. She just gets smart with me. They’ve been staying downstairs other than when she comes up to get their plates of food when I cook supper.<\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n

Thanks,<\/span><\/strong>
\nFrustrated & Confused<\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n

Dear Frustrated & Confused,<\/em><\/p>\n

It sounds like you and your husband are already on the right track because you both let your daughter and her boyfriend know that their forgetfulness with the utilities has caused a spike in cost for the whole household and that the agreed upon amount of rent is simply not enough.<\/em><\/p>\n

We learn as we grow to pay for what we need and want.\u00a0 In order for the home environment to be peaceful there must be a balance.\u00a0 Ask yourself:\u00a0 What is necessary to create balance in my home?\u00a0 What needs to be done for harmony to be restored?\u00a0 Use the answers to help you figure out what is fair for everyone involved.<\/em><\/p>\n

Right now they are taking far more than they are giving and it is throwing the energy of your home out of whack.\u00a0 To right the balance all 4 adults under the same roof need to come to a compromise whereupon the mortgage, utilities and groceries are all able to be paid each month.\u00a0<\/em><\/p>\n

As far as financial issues are concerned – your daughter and her boyfriend owe money for what they have used already.\u00a0 In order to steer away from a potentially more difficult situation I think the key is for everything to be fair to everyone involved.\u00a0 If the money cannot be paid within an amount of time that you and your husband agree upon then it would be prudent to kindly and lovingly suggest that your daughter and her boyfriend find different living accommodations.\u00a0<\/em><\/p>\n

In regards to the treatment of you and your husband by your daughter I suggest that the 3 of you sit down and have an honest and open heart to heart that is loving and compassionate and full of forgiveness.\u00a0 Forgiveness has a way of mending so much.\u00a0<\/em><\/p>\n

I hope that these steps will help you and your family find balance once again.<\/em><\/p>\n

Blessed Be,<\/em><\/p>\n

Jules<\/em><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Please send your questions\u00a0to me at\u00a0thecraftwytch@gmail.com. All printed questions\u00a0will\u00a0remain anonymous once printed \u2013 please sign your questions the way you would a \u201cDear Abby\u201d submission with something along the lines of\u00a0\u201cLonely in Seattle.\u201d<\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Hello Jules, I would really like to know how to let go. Let go of sadness, anger, any\/all negativity. Thank you for your time. Letting Go Dear Letting Go, I think that acceptance plays a big part on the road to letting go.\u00a0 Our lives feel lighter and more manageable when we take the time to accept ourselves, our lives, our pasts, presents and futures, our fears, anger, negativity and positive emotions as well.\u00a0 I think it is important especially to take the time to accept the current situation that we are dealing with.\u00a0 Through acceptance we are able to let go of the things that weigh us down. Joseph Campbell said \u201cWe must be willing to let go of the life we\u2019ve planned, so as to have the life that is waiting for us.\u201d Blessings, Jules   Dear Jules, My daughter & her b\/f have been staying with my hubby & me for 6 months. They give us $250 a month for staying. We’ve gotten behind on bills. It’s catching up with us. We just bought this home in May & we were delinquent on our payment this month. Our water bill was late. They run the heater downstairs full blast\u2026 The toilet needs\u2026 is leaking & running all the time. They didn’t tell us. We had to figure it out. So we told them to shut the water off to the toilet.\u00a0 There’s 2 more bathrooms upstairs but they still use that one. They turn the water on to it & forget to turn it back off\u2026 I’ve told them repeatedly to stop all of these things. They leave lights on when not home\u2026 They both get a few dollars food stamps a month but when they go grocery shopping it’s all for them downstairs. … Last time I went with her she got a car full & out of that 3 bags went upstairs yet I cook everyday & they eat our food. So, my hubby gave them 2 weeks to decide. Pay 1\/2 utilities,\u00a0 cable, & 1\/2 of all groceries & they don’t have to pay the $250 a month rent so really it won’t cost too much extra. She got smart with me & said none of it is their fault\u2026 our light bill is way up, groceries times 2 because there’s 2 extra people to feed, & from the leaking our water bill was $130 this month which I barely got paid before they turned it off. My hubby puts in a lot of hours at work & we’re not making it all the while they’re getting a roof over their heads, cable, internet, water, lights, Netflix, food, etc. They have 2 weeks to decide on paying 1\/2 on what we ask or get their own place. They act as though we’re kicking them out when clearly we told them we are not! They can stay\u2026 My daughter refuses to talk to her Dad about anything. She just gets smart with me. They’ve been staying downstairs other than when she comes up to get their plates of food when I cook supper. Thanks, Frustrated & Confused Dear Frustrated & Confused, It sounds like you and your husband are already on the right track because you both let your daughter and her boyfriend know that their forgetfulness with the utilities has caused a spike in cost for the whole household and that the agreed upon amount of rent is simply not enough. We learn as we grow to pay for what we need and want.\u00a0 In order for the home environment to be peaceful there must be a balance.\u00a0 Ask yourself:\u00a0 What is necessary to create balance in my home?\u00a0 What needs to be done for harmony to be restored?\u00a0 Use the answers to help you figure out what is fair for everyone involved. Right now they are taking far more than they are giving and it is throwing the energy of your home out of whack.\u00a0 To right the balance all 4 adults under the same roof need to come to a compromise whereupon the mortgage, utilities and groceries are all able to be paid each month.\u00a0 As far as financial issues are concerned – your daughter and her boyfriend owe money for what they have used already.\u00a0 In order to steer away from a potentially more difficult situation I think the key is for everything to be fair to everyone involved.\u00a0 If the money cannot be paid within an amount of time that you and your husband agree upon then it would be prudent to kindly and lovingly suggest that your daughter and her boyfriend find different living accommodations.\u00a0 In regards to the treatment of you and your husband by your daughter I suggest that the 3 of you sit down and have an honest and open heart to heart that is loving and compassionate and full of forgiveness.\u00a0 Forgiveness has a way of mending so much.\u00a0 I hope that these steps will help you and your family find balance once again. Blessed Be, Jules   Please send your questions\u00a0to me at\u00a0thecraftwytch@gmail.com. All printed questions\u00a0will\u00a0remain anonymous once printed \u2013 please sign your questions the way you would a \u201cDear Abby\u201d submission with something along the lines of\u00a0\u201cLonely in Seattle.\u201d<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":221,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"iawp_total_views":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-10576","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry"],"acf":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/paganpages.org\/emagazine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/10576","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/paganpages.org\/emagazine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/paganpages.org\/emagazine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/paganpages.org\/emagazine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/221"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/paganpages.org\/emagazine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=10576"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/paganpages.org\/emagazine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/10576\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/paganpages.org\/emagazine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=10576"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/paganpages.org\/emagazine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=10576"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/paganpages.org\/emagazine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=10576"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}