{"id":2706,"date":"2009-11-01T01:10:03","date_gmt":"2009-11-01T06:10:03","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/paganpages.org\/content\/?p=2763"},"modified":"2009-10-28T11:34:52","modified_gmt":"2009-10-28T16:34:52","slug":"role-of-a-mentor-4","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/paganpages.org\/emagazine\/2009\/11\/01\/role-of-a-mentor-4\/","title":{"rendered":"Role of a Mentor"},"content":{"rendered":"

<\/span>Learning in Adversity<\/strong><\/p>\n

How many of us have wished for a life that flowed smoothly, with no adversity?\u00a0 At one time, I said a daily affirmation that asked for a life, “safe, secure and perfectly smooth.”\u00a0 When I look back at my life, it is clear that I learned more during the rough times than the smooth ones.<\/p>\n

While it is certainly less stressful when our lives are running smoothly, we also tend to become complacent, taking things for granted, and may even get lazy.\u00a0 How many know Christians who attend church, read the Bible, or pray only when they or someone close to them are facing some crisis?\u00a0 I’ve been as guilty as some other Pagans in being far more likely to work ritual and magick when faced with stress or an urgent need.\u00a0 It is my opinion that this is just human nature, but we can use it to our advantage to focus on our spirituality.<\/p>\n

If you become more spiritual in trying times, think about why this happens.\u00a0 Does your faith sustain you at this time?\u00a0 Do you feel that the gods are helping and protecting you?\u00a0 Is the experience teaching you a spiritual lesson?\u00a0 Does it cause you to turn to others who share your beliefs for comfort and\/or requests for magickal assistance?\u00a0 There is no reason for any of these to be restricted to times of trial; they can benefit all of us in good times as well as bad.<\/p>\n

The loss of someone close to you is one of the most tragic experiences that a person can endure.\u00a0 Some people lose their faith to their grief while others find that it sustains them when they feel that they just can’t go on.\u00a0 I lost my 17 year old son in a drowning accident in 2005.\u00a0 He was a spiritual seeker and we discussed Wicca\/Paganism along with many other topics.\u00a0 After such a loss, you can give up and die inside or find the strength to keep living.\u00a0 Less than a year later, his mother and I filed for divorce.\u00a0 She gave up and died three years after him, while I met a lady who brought love and joy for living to my daughter and I.\u00a0 While his mother and I were driving to the spot on the Sandusky River where he was last seen, I had a vision.\u00a0 In my mind’s eye, I saw a brilliant white light that would have blinded me on the physical plane.\u00a0 Out of the light, I felt a sense of great wisdom, perfect love and compassion.\u00a0 I heard a woman’s voice speaking firmly but with compassion, saying, “It’s OK, he’s with Me now.”\u00a0 Then, it faded away and I knew that the Goddess had spoken to me, letting me know that my son had crossed over.\u00a0 I had a similar experience in December 1984 when my grandmother was taken to the hospital following a heart attack, except the voice was male.\u00a0 When my grief attacked my faith and I asked, “How could a just and loving god(dess) allow this to happen?” I recalled the visions and remembered how the Lady and Lord spoke to me when I lost two people so close to me.<\/p>\n

A common obstacle among Pagans, especially youth, is having to hide their beliefs and practice in secret.\u00a0 Some parents of young Pagans are understanding, accommodating and may even take the time to learn something about it themselves.\u00a0 However, others forbid their children from following this path out of fear or misunderstanding.\u00a0 I have read stories of youth who even in the face of parental opposition, found a way to learn and practice.\u00a0 While I’m not advocating children defying their parents, this is an example of how adversity can make someone stronger in their faith and more determined to follow it.<\/p>\n

I became Wiccan 15 years ago at age 33, but did not tell my first wife about it for ten years, which was a mistake.\u00a0 Even though she thought it was “superstitious hooey”, she was upset that I hid something so important to me.\u00a0 I was creative in finding ways to study and practice and once I was “out” to her, I slackened in my studies.\u00a0 My second wife knew up front about my beliefs and found it was something that intrigued her.\u00a0 She encourages me to learn, practice and seek out like minded people.\u00a0 After a period where I was hit or miss, I took my path seriously again and attended two Pagan picnics in Indianapolis, one of them with her.\u00a0 I wonder if it is just something in human nature that makes us more determined to do something when we are forbidden to do it, or at least think we are, than when we are given the green light to do it?<\/p>\n

Pagans in prison definitely face obstacles, but are usually quite determined to learn and practice.\u00a0 While by law they have the same freedom of religion as any other prisoner, getting that freedom is quite another matter.\u00a0 I have read and heard news reports criticizing efforts to accommodate Pagan prisoners and know that Pagan clergy have faced obstacles and outright opposition in efforts to be prison chaplains.\u00a0 There are safety concerns which cause items we take for granted such as an athame, wand, or candles to be prohibited to inmates.\u00a0 It is difficult for them to obtain Pagan books and magazines and a lot of people are reluctant to donate items to prisoners or correspond with them.\u00a0 About nine years ago, I had the opportunity to be a pen pal to a Pagan prisoner in California and found it to be an educational and rewarding exchange.\u00a0 He was appreciative that someone on the “outside” took an interest in him and explained to me the difficulties in being allowed to participate in ritual\u00a0 with other prisoners as well as the way they improvised replacements for banned items.\u00a0 He told me how they were petitioning the Board of Prisons to allow Patrick McCollum to visit as a chaplain and later told me what a enthusiastic reception McCollum received once this request was granted.\u00a0 We intelligently discussed topics related to our spirituality as well as his plans for a productive life once he was released.\u00a0 The last letter I received from him came from a halfway house where he was out of prison but not yet released to freedom.\u00a0 I certainly hope that freedom was the new life he so looked forward to.\u00a0 Besides wanting a second chance at life, he always struck me as someone who was serious about his spirituality\u00a0 and determined not to let anything keep him from it.\u00a0 He certainly found a way in the face of adversity that most of us can only imagine.<\/p>\n

If spirituality was something that occurred only during the good times, anyone could do it.\u00a0 It is in the face of challenges that we show our true determination and in most of us they inspire us to take our faith more seriously and be more dedicated to it.\u00a0 Adversity is a powerful teacher and motivator and in my opinion we should try just as hard in the easy times as the hard ones to get the most out of our spiritual path.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Learning in Adversity How many of us have wished for a life that flowed smoothly, with no adversity?\u00a0 At one time, I said a daily affirmation that asked for a life, “safe, secure and perfectly smooth.”\u00a0 When I look back at my life, it is clear that I learned more during the rough times than the smooth ones. While it is certainly less stressful when our lives are running smoothly, we also tend to become complacent, taking things for granted, and may even get lazy.\u00a0 How many know Christians who attend church, read the Bible, or pray only when they or someone close to them are facing some crisis?\u00a0 I’ve been as guilty as some other Pagans in being far more likely to work ritual and magick when faced with stress or an urgent need.\u00a0 It is my opinion that this is just human nature, but we can use it to our advantage to focus on our spirituality. If you become more spiritual in trying times, think about why this happens.\u00a0 Does your faith sustain you at this time?\u00a0 Do you feel that the gods are helping and protecting you?\u00a0 Is the experience teaching you a spiritual lesson?\u00a0 Does it cause you to turn to others who share your beliefs for comfort and\/or requests for magickal assistance?\u00a0 There is no reason for any of these to be restricted to times of trial; they can benefit all of us in good times as well as bad. The loss of someone close to you is one of the most tragic experiences that a person can endure.\u00a0 Some people lose their faith to their grief while others find that it sustains them when they feel that they just can’t go on.\u00a0 I lost my 17 year old son in a drowning accident in 2005.\u00a0 He was a spiritual seeker and we discussed Wicca\/Paganism along with many other topics.\u00a0 After such a loss, you can give up and die inside or find the strength to keep living.\u00a0 Less than a year later, his mother and I filed for divorce.\u00a0 She gave up and died three years after him, while I met a lady who brought love and joy for living to my daughter and I.\u00a0 While his mother and I were driving to the spot on the Sandusky River where he was last seen, I had a vision.\u00a0 In my mind’s eye, I saw a brilliant white light that would have blinded me on the physical plane.\u00a0 Out of the light, I felt a sense of great wisdom, perfect love and compassion.\u00a0 I heard a woman’s voice speaking firmly but with compassion, saying, “It’s OK, he’s with Me now.”\u00a0 Then, it faded away and I knew that the Goddess had spoken to me, letting me know that my son had crossed over.\u00a0 I had a similar experience in December 1984 when my grandmother was taken to the hospital following a heart attack, except the voice was male.\u00a0 When my grief attacked my faith and I asked, “How could a just and loving god(dess) allow this to happen?” I recalled the visions and remembered how the Lady and Lord spoke to me when I lost two people so close to me. A common obstacle among Pagans, especially youth, is having to hide their beliefs and practice in secret.\u00a0 Some parents of young Pagans are understanding, accommodating and may even take the time to learn something about it themselves.\u00a0 However, others forbid their children from following this path out of fear or misunderstanding.\u00a0 I have read stories of youth who even in the face of parental opposition, found a way to learn and practice.\u00a0 While I’m not advocating children defying their parents, this is an example of how adversity can make someone stronger in their faith and more determined to follow it. I became Wiccan 15 years ago at age 33, but did not tell my first wife about it for ten years, which was a mistake.\u00a0 Even though she thought it was “superstitious hooey”, she was upset that I hid something so important to me.\u00a0 I was creative in finding ways to study and practice and once I was “out” to her, I slackened in my studies.\u00a0 My second wife knew up front about my beliefs and found it was something that intrigued her.\u00a0 She encourages me to learn, practice and seek out like minded people.\u00a0 After a period where I was hit or miss, I took my path seriously again and attended two Pagan picnics in Indianapolis, one of them with her.\u00a0 I wonder if it is just something in human nature that makes us more determined to do something when we are forbidden to do it, or at least think we are, than when we are given the green light to do it? Pagans in prison definitely face obstacles, but are usually quite determined to learn and practice.\u00a0 While by law they have the same freedom of religion as any other prisoner, getting that freedom is quite another matter.\u00a0 I have read and heard news reports criticizing efforts to accommodate Pagan prisoners and know that Pagan clergy have faced obstacles and outright opposition in efforts to be prison chaplains.\u00a0 There are safety concerns which cause items we take for granted such as an athame, wand, or candles to be prohibited to inmates.\u00a0 It is difficult for them to obtain Pagan books and magazines and a lot of people are reluctant to donate items to prisoners or correspond with them.\u00a0 About nine years ago, I had the opportunity to be a pen pal to a Pagan prisoner in California and found it to be an educational and rewarding exchange.\u00a0 He was appreciative that someone on the “outside” took an interest in him and explained to me the difficulties in being allowed to participate in ritual\u00a0 with other prisoners as well as the way they improvised replacements for banned items.\u00a0 He told me how they were petitioning the Board of Prisons to allow Patrick McCollum to visit as a chaplain and later told me what a enthusiastic reception McCollum received once this request was granted.\u00a0 We intelligently discussed topics related to our spirituality as well as his plans for a productive life once he was released.\u00a0 The last letter I received from him came from a halfway house where he was out of prison but not yet released to freedom.\u00a0 I certainly hope that freedom was the new life he so looked forward to.\u00a0 Besides wanting a second chance at life, he always struck me as someone who was serious about his spirituality\u00a0 and determined not to let anything keep him from it.\u00a0 He certainly found a way in the face of adversity that most of us can only imagine. If spirituality was something that occurred only during the good times, anyone could do it.\u00a0 It is in the face of challenges that we show our true determination and in most of us they inspire us to take our faith more seriously and be more dedicated to it.\u00a0 Adversity is a powerful teacher and motivator and in my opinion we should try just as hard in the easy times as the hard ones to get the most out of our spiritual path.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":59,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"iawp_total_views":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2706","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry"],"acf":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/paganpages.org\/emagazine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2706","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/paganpages.org\/emagazine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/paganpages.org\/emagazine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/paganpages.org\/emagazine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/59"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/paganpages.org\/emagazine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2706"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/paganpages.org\/emagazine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2706\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/paganpages.org\/emagazine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2706"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/paganpages.org\/emagazine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2706"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/paganpages.org\/emagazine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2706"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}