I am the swan-white Crow, the rare blonde, the most beautiful of all the Crows. I stand out amongst my black-haired relatives like a snowflake on obsidian. Like the bird my family is named after, I adapt. I take what I can to survive.<\/p>\n
The record stops and the needle moves back to the beginning. Chaka Khan starts singing once again about being every woman\u2014my mantra for tonight\u2014even if slightly untrue. My goal when I go out hunting isn\u2019t to be every<\/i> woman. When I find my mark, I just need to be the woman he<\/i> wants. I can figure it out in practically no time at all. Does he want the lost girl looking for someone to love her? Or the temptress who wants control? I see it in their eyes\u2014the way they move over my body. It hides between their words. I know who they\u2019re after, and I become her.<\/p>\n
I never hunt in the same place, and I never give my real name. I\u2019ve been Angelique, Belle, Desdemona, Guenvere, Aurora\u2026 Men like exotic names because it feels more like a fantasy. My real name\u2014Donna\u2014is too real. Their daughter could have my name, or worse, their wife.<\/p>\n
I strike a match and light my black candle. Black candles are best for lighting ritual candles because black is the absence of color. I light the white candle on my altar, for attraction and protection. The red candle beside it comes next\u2014love and lust. In the center of the small\u00a0 table, on a carved wooden pentagram, three candles form a triangle\u2014green, gold and orange\u2014colors for abundance.<\/p>\n
I take a slow breath while lighting them, careful not to drip black wax and taint the spell. Soon I might be lighting these candles for another reason if tonight doesn\u2019t go well. I speak my desire into existence, and hope the Goddess is listening.<\/p>\n
At my dressing table, I run a brush through long cornsilk hair. All Mom ever told me was that my father was from Sweden, and that my hair came from him. I got the high cheekbones and crystal blue eyes the rest of my family has. We may be notorious and dysfunctional, but we are beautiful people\u2014if nothing else. Being the most beautiful Crow makes my hunting trips easier.<\/p>\n
I wear red lipstick to match my red dress and red nails. Red is the color of temptation. A little vanilla extract and rose oil goes on each wrist and on my neck, something Grandma suggested.<\/p>\n
While I\u2019m sliding on black thigh high stockings and hooking them to my garter belt, I hear Mike and Victor talking downstairs. The car they just fixed up isn\u2019t selling as fast as expected. Mike is better at negotiating and making them think they\u2019re getting a deal. Victor feels guilty about the mind games.<\/p>\n
Mara is studying in her room across the hall. She will be the first of us to finish high school, and maybe go on to college. Imagine that\u2026 a Crow with an education.<\/p>\n
In the full length mirror I look myself over. The red dress hugs my body all the right ways. If I\u2019m lucky I will get what I need tonight without taking it off. Sometimes all they want is conversation, something far more dangerous than sex.<\/p>\n
Behind me the candles flicker, casting orange light onto the walls and making my shadow its own entity. The shadow is the real me\u2014Donna Angelina Crow. The huntress is only a mask.<\/p>\n
The red high heels I slip on complete the look. I blow out the candles, releasing my intention into the night, and shut off the music and bedroom light before gliding down the stairs.<\/p>\n
Mike and Victor are drinking at the kitchen table. \u201cI told you we should have taken apart the damn carburetor, Vic.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWe still can, it just might take a little longer to get the parts.\u201d<\/p>\n
Mike looks at me and sets his PBR down. \u201cGoing out tonight?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYou don\u2019t see me dressing like this to sit at home, do you?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cThe electric is due, Donna,\u201d Victor says. \u201cDon\u2019t spend too much.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWe\u2019ll have the money tomorrow,\u201d I assure them.<\/p>\n
\u201cHas Mom called this week?\u201d<\/p>\n
I shake my head and let them go on with their conversation.<\/p>\n
I think tonight my name will be Veronica.<\/p>\n
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