Pagan Parenting for the Under 5’s
In this month’s article I’d like to discuss life cycles and the wheel of life. It is up to us to teach our children about life cycles. We are born, we grow, we get older and we die. That is the life cycle in its most basic of terms. A child under 2 is too young for this discussion so this month’s article focuses on ages 2-5.
Point out examples of the life cycle all around you, new babies, older kids, adult, older adults and the seniors. Remember that kids this age don’t have a good sense of time so if you point out an elderly person and say the person is close to death, they will think you mean tomorrow. So don’t say that. You can just state that this person (the elderly person) is near the end of her life cycle. No matter how you present it, at some point your child may walk up to an older stranger and tell him matter-of-factly that he is old and near the end of his life cycle (or even near death). While this will be embarrassing at first, just explain to the older person that you are teaching your child about the cycle of life and that you apologize for the child’s bluntness. Later that day or the next day when the moment is forgotten, explain to your child that some people are sensitive about their age and so we don’t usually say that people are old. Your child may need a few reminders, depending on their age but they will eventually get it.
Whether or not you believe in reincarnation, birth is a continuation of the life cycle because if people only died and no one was born, there wouldn’t be life. It is up to you if you want your child to witness giving birth but children under age 5 most likely aren’t ready for it. Perhaps the 41/2 – 5 year old would be ready. I would say if you wish to show your child how babies are born, I’d stick with puppies or kitties. Seeing their mom or another woman giving birth might scare them and they might resent the baby, thinking it is the baby’s fault that the woman was in pain.
As you describe the life cycle, the question of what death is will crop up. Everyone always freaks out when the word death is brought up. If our children see us freak when they ask the question, they will notice and think that death is something bad and to be feared. We don’t want that. We want them to see death as just another part of the life cycle. For specific words to say to explain death, the life cycle and much more, check out Just Tell Me What to Say by Betsy Brown Braun. It’s an awesome book all about children ages 2-6.
As you are teaching about the life cycle, you can also teach the wheel of life, explaining that it is the life cycle of our world. Equate the two by showing that when new leaves and flowers grow, it’s like a baby being born and when the trees die in the winter, it’s like our death.
As your child sees that each season always comes and goes, you can point out that people will always be born and always die. That’s why it’s a cycle, because it keeps going on and on.
I think teaching your child these things is very important, especially starting at age 3. As Betsy Brown Braun says, if you teach your children about the life cycle and death from early on, when someone or some pet they know dies, they will be more likely to accept it and start to understand it.
All right that’s it for this month; I hope you’ve found something helpful. As always, if you have any questions, comments or suggestions, please email me at [email protected]. I always welcome comments here too of course; it’s great to know my article is being read.