“What to Do When a Friendship Isn’t Working”
*An Excerpt from The Junior Astrologer’s Handbook: A Kid’s Guide to Astrological Signs, the Zodiac, and More by Nikki Van De Car, illustrated by Uta Krogmann
Certain signs just have a hard time bonding with one another. It doesn’t mean they can never be friends, or that these aren’t extremely valuable relationships—it just means that maybe they require a little more intention and work than others.
You can have a tough time with Capricorn, Cancer, and sometimes Pisces or other Aries. When that happens, try to check your own impulses—are you being too fiery? Are you being impatient? And then, play to your strengths! You are incredibly honest about both the positives and the negatives of any situation. Show your affection, and then have a heart-to-heart about the friendship.
You tend to butt heads with Leo, Aquarius, some Aries, and often other Tauruses. When these signs are asking you to be more flexible than you like, how can you work with that? If you feel like your needs are never being respected, then you can talk about that—but you should also consider that maybe you can go with the flow a bit more.
You can get along with pretty much anybody, but if you do get irritated, it tends to be by a Virgo, a Pisces, or sometimes a Taurus or another Gemini. If that’s the case, it’s often because you, dear Gemini, are taking on qualities of someone else that don’t feel right for you—or you’re being annoyed by behavior that is too like your own. Have a look inside. Probably what you need is a break, and you should take it before things get out of hand.
Aries, Libra, and sometimes Gemini or another Cancer can hurt your feelings from time to time. Your sensitive nature makes this likely—but you shouldn’t necessarily blame yourself. When someone is being thoughtless, you need to let them know. They probably didn’t mean it, but their behavior won’t change unless you talk to them about it.
Scorpio and Taurus, as well as Cancer or another Leo, don’t always recognize how vulnerable you are, deep down. Remember, you hide it well, so you can’t necessarily expect them to get it! Rather than becoming angry and lashing out, take a deep breath. You’ve done the same thing to others—is it possible you’ve done it this time, as well? The good news is, you’re very good at apologizing and at asking for what you need.
You can feel taken advantage of by Gemini, Sagittarius, and sometimes Leo or another Virgo. You do so much for other people, and these signs occasionally have a tendency to simply not realize it and give you the credit you’re due. Odds are they aren’t doing it on purpose, though. Don’t let your resentment simmer. You can change your behavior and do a little less for them.
Cancer, Capricorn, and sometimes Virgo or another Libra can occasionally push at your boundaries. You have strong opinions on what is right and wrong—and what is fair and unfair—but you don’t always communicate them clearly. If someone is doing something you feel is wrong, speak up.
Your sense of innate reserve can confuse Leo, Aquarius, and sometimes Libra or another Scorpio, and they may react badly. The truth is, they probably feel like you don’t like them. Make an effort to open up a little bit more. It really is worth it.
Virgo, Pisces, and sometimes Scorpio or another Sagittarius may be thrown by your carefree outlook. You know it doesn’t mean you don’t feel things deeply or understand what matters, but they might find it hard to see that. Take a bit of time to reassure those around you.
You sometimes have a hard time getting along with Aries, Libra, and sometimes Sagittarius or another Capricorn. You are very focused, and sometimes that can come off as distant or unwilling to compromise. The truth is that you feel things very deeply, but don’t always want to have a discussion. Push at that boundary a little bit, and see if maybe you can let other people in just a bit closer.
Your creative and somewhat loosey-goosey nature can be a little confusing to Taurus, Scorpio, or even Capricorn or another Aquarius. They are often more structured than you are, and you can feel like you just don’t get each other. But you love having a wide variety of friends and interests—take a minute to see what they have to offer!
You don’t always mix well with Gemini, Sagittarius, Aquarius, or even another Pisces. You are so sweet and loving, but your chill, “it will happen when it happens” attitude can feel frustrating or even dismissive to your friends who are a little more action-oriented. When you make plans together, make sure you stick to them!