A Meditation on Loss
What do you do when you lose everything?
Losing everything to you might mean losing all of your friends, or the job to which you’ve dedicated your life. It could mean losing a loved one, or several loved ones, to death. It could mean losing all of your most cherished possessions, or your home, or your car.
When we suffer losses, a void is left inside us, a huge abyss of emptiness that was once full of comfort and security. We might even feel guilty for mourning our loss, as if we don’t have the right to our own feelings. There always seems to be someone out there who is even worse off.
Well-meaning people will try to put a positive spin on your loss, or tell you to be strong, or buck up, all of which actually make you feel worse, or cause you to hide or suppress the depths of your grief.
Wise people will give you a hug, a space to grieve, and the time to come to your own decision about what you need.
This month’s meditation will allow you to give yourself the space you need to grieve your losses, however big or small they may seem to others.
Give yourself the gifts of privacy and solitude. Burn incense, light a candle, or play soft music if you feel moved to do so. You may want to perform this meditation during a bath, perhaps adding salt to the bathwater to help soak up all the released emotion. Sit or lay down and relax, breathing slowly and deeply, allowing your eyes to drift closed or to softly focus on the drifting incense smoke or the flickering candle light.
Imagine the rays of the full moon bathing your skin, your aura, your soul, gently dissolving and washing away dark smudges of fear, pain, anger, and grief, leaving the wounds bare and clean and ready for healing.
Breathe deeply and slowly, pulling air and peaceful moonlight into your body, your heart, your spirit, soothing you inside and out. As the moonlight cleanses you, imagine you are walking along a path to your sacred space, a place where you feel safe, where no one can find you unless you want to be found, a place where you can scream as loud as you need to or curl into a ball and sob or rock yourself.
Enter that place. Breathe deeply, faster, allowing the dark balls of emotion and energy that you have been stuffing to work their way to your throat chakra, where they can finally be released. Cry if you need to cry. Scream if you need to scream. Rage if you need to rage. Free all of your emotions; allow them to flow through you and out of you, in this safe space where no one can judge you or hurt you in any other way.
When the wave of emotion ebbs, you may feel lighter. You may still hurt, but the hurt will feel different. Now you must nourish yourself, give yourself what you need to heal, to start filling that void with warmth and love before any more festering grief, fear, or anger can set in.
In the privacy of your sacred space, call your loved ones to you. Call your angels, totems, spirit guides, departed loved ones, and the spirits and hearts of your living friends and family to you and ask them to help you heal. Feel them embrace you with the nourishing loving touches of their spirit bodies. Allow them to cocoon you in warm buzzing love and light. Cry if you need to, and breath in this love. Soak it in. Allow it to fill you, nourish you, and begin the healing process in your wounded places.
When you feel ready, give thanks. Ask for help to find you in the physical world. Pray.
Then return to the path that leads to your body. Breath slowly and deeply, drawing air into your toes and feet. Draw invigorating air into your ankles, your calves, your knees, and thighs. Breathe into your hips, your belly, your hands, wrists, arms, chest, and shoulders. Draw cleansing air into your throat, your face, and your crown.
Stand and brush yourself off with your fingers, casting off any traces of the dark emotions you’ve just released. If you were in the bath, let the water drain out and turn on the shower for a quick rinse or a full body wash. Then take in three fortifying breaths, and know that you are becoming more whole.