The Warrior Goddess
Appreciation
Today I am sitting down at my computer from a long vacation. My husband and I went on an adventure to Nevada and California visiting my family… who happens to live smack in the middle of nowhere. Let me tell you about my vacation and then I will get to the point of this months article (I promise, they are related). I am going to leave the name of the town out, because I don’t want to bring a lot of attention to it; it is one of those places you must discover for yourself… not that you can really find it on a map.
My husband and I took a flight from Melbourne. We boarded the plane, packed ourselves in like sardines and then listened to the emergency instructions from the flight attendant. As she was pointing out the few exit doors I thought “what is the point, we are so packed in here no one will make it anyway”; and that is true. There really is very little point in showing passengers where the exit door is. Firstly, almost no one would make it out. Secondly, if the plane was blowing up or crashing, where are you gonna go; do you have a parachute? My most important point is that I think I was maybe one of 5 people actually paying attention to the poor flight attendant going through her humdrum spiel. Everyone else had headphones on, was reading a book, talking or whatever. So even if we could make it out, who would know where to go?
Now, I am not afraid to fly by any means. I actually like it as I can see that there is still nature and beauty in this country when flying over it. However, thinking about what I was thinking about, I began to have an appreciation for how fragile life is and how for granted most people seem to take it. So think about what I thought about. How amazing is it that we simply exist? How beautiful is it that two people can unify in an act of celebration and joy and create life with that energy? How truly amazing is it that I exist because somewhere billions of years ago the Universe decided to mass together space debris and create the Earth. I think that is pretty amazing. I also think it is sad that I (and most others) do not think about it more often. If we all reminded ourselves of this even just once a month, I bet the world would be a friendlier place.
Now, back to our flight. We were in the air and my thought was “finally, we are on vacation… now I hope that nothing goes wrong”. Normally, I am not a pessimist, but over the last 6 years my husband and I have tried to take vacations and they have had to be canceled every time, usually because of something beyond our control like someone dying or hurricanes taking the roof off of our house. Ya’ know; small annoying stuff like that. (In case you didn’t ‘hear’ my tone; that was sarcastic.)
Anyway, we made it to Atlanta, got off the plane and were bombarded with rude people trying to get to where they were going. I felt like I was in a war zone. We had 4 hours to make our connection, but I guess others didn’t because they were willing to push and gouge their way through to get where they were going. I thought “wow, I hope none of these people are on vacation, they must be having a miserable time!” I gained yet another appreciation… I could appreciate that I had the ability to actually try and enjoy myself rather than rush around everywhere trying to get from point A to point B, without really seeing what is in between.
We got on our new flight, and arrived in Reno about 10 PM; my sister was there to greet us. We went to a hotel and stayed the night, because her little town was not close to anything. It was not an hour away from Reno, not even two… it was SIX HOURS from Reno and about the same from Las Vegas. I was still in “city mode” at this point. I wanted my internet, which was not working, I wanted my phone, which was not working and then I thought “why do I want these things? This is stupid; I am on vacation, why am I so attached to being connected?” So I put my laptop and my phone away and really got an appreciation for where I was and what I was doing. It was really interesting and strange, but we are so connected, this was one of the most difficult things for me to do… but I did it and I recommend an occasional disconnect to everyone now and then.
The next morning we left the hotel and started the six hour drive to her little town. Once we got out of Reno and Carson City, everything was beautiful. There were mountains, hills, a beautiful blue sky… We took lots of pictures. I was surprised to look at a thermometer and see that the temperature was 90. In the dry air it felt like 80 does in Florida. It was so nice, so peaceful.
We approached the little town my sister lived in and she pointed out “town”, which consisted of a post office (which was a small trailer), a little restaurant, a couple of bars and a general store. The town is filled with mostly farmers and ranchers. As I was approaching, I was not expecting to like it much… I mean a farming town in the middle of nowhere, no movie theatre, no pagan meet ups, no dojo’s… what is there to do? My expectations were way off, I liked the place instantly, and so did my husband.
My sister drove us through town and down the 9 miles of mostly empty space to her house. The place was great… a couple of acres of land, her nice little house, her barns and stables and behind her land, desert scrub and mountains as far as you could see. When we were not speaking, everything was so quiet it just made you want to stay that way. We were instantly reminded, as we are every visit to nature, that in the country one does not need movies and meet ups to enjoy ones self.
When we stopped speaking and just stood there, unlike in the city, I could feel the energy of the stillness and of the quiet. I could hear the land speaking to me. I could hear the sky speaking to me. I could hear the wind in my ears and I could even hear my own heart beat for a short time. I suddenly had this burst of energy like Mother Nature said to me “hello, there you are, I have been missing you”.
During our trip there we saw many amazing things… some I had seen before and others I haven’t. I stood in snow on the near top of a mountain only a few days after the Summer Solstice. I collected wild sage from the desert. I collected water from a powerful lake that was so volcanically active, there were Co2 warnings posted everywhere (don’t worry, we were allowed there, we aren’t so stupid as to go into a cordoned off area). I left energy for the places I went. I felt leaving a physical gift would be littering and degrading the beauty of the place, so I gifted of my own energy instead.
At all times, I was always awe struck by the power of Nature. One night we sat outside my sister’s house and looked at the stars. There were so many it dumbfounded me and for the first time in over a decade, I saw the Milky Way. I had forgotten that it was even in the sky. It was so clear; we could see satellites in orbit as small moving specks of light. I saw multiple shooting stars, although I decided not to make any wishes. I regained my full appreciation of nature there… I didn’t want to leave.
When it was time to go home, I felt reluctant, although I missed my animal friends. I thought “I hate Florida, I want to move out now, Florida is a hole and no one is meant to live here, so much nature has been taken out of Florida, how can I ever connect”. We traveled back to Reno and I proceeded to win a small jackpot at the quarter slots. Woo hoo; other than the cost of the plane tickets, my trip was nearly free for us because of it! I got a new appreciation there for something else… how people so easily become “zombified” at machines.
We took our small bag of quarters and split them between us… that and 5 dollars in cash was what we decided to gamble. So we did. By the time I had won, I was pretty bored and was wondering how people did this all day. Even after I won, I didn’t want to do it any longer. I looked around and saw so many people blankly staring at the slots, rhythmically putting in the quarter and pushing the button over and over again. I could have marched to the beat. Some of them were pale, there eyes were blood shot. It was kinda scary actually. We went upstairs to sleep at about 11 PM. When my husband and I went downstairs to catch our plane at 4 AM, some of the same people were still there. I got an appreciation for how easily people are manipulated and addicted and I was very appreciative that I was not such a victim. I wondered what made my husband and me different from those people sitting at the slots… I still do.
We made our way home and I will tell you, the journey was fairly miserable. The airports back were worse than on the way there. The flights were worse. Or maybe it was just that we noticed it more because of where we had been. We got off the plane and it was hot and humid. It felt worse at night in Florida than the 110 degrees it got to be in Nevada. We both sighed and talked about how we were going to move out of Florida as soon as possible… “We hate it here”, we said.
We got home and our pets were a joy to see, so it made it better. We had another week at home. It was during this time that I learned my biggest lesson of this journey… appreciate what you don’t have, but more importantly, appreciate what you have. In other words… it is ok to want greener grass; as long as you appreciate that the grass you have now is also beautiful.
As I relaxed at home with my husband for this week, I realized that although I love it where my sister is and I would love to move there, I also have a lot here that I love. It is true that much of Florida has been industrialized and is quite ugly, but there is still beauty if you look. It is true that the weather is hot and miserable at times, but it can also be pleasant. In the small town I could have nature and beauty and one day I fully intend to have that; but for now, here, I have learned (once again) to appreciate what has been gifted to me.
So here is my lesson for this month… a Warrior Goddess appreciates what was, what is and what will be. She looks to the future and what she sees as better for herself, but while doing so, she also appreciates what she has at present and is truly thankful for it. This can sometimes be a major challenge, especially when times are rough, but it can be done. This is a relatively easy battle if you let it be.
I learned this lesson long ago and am often reminded of it during my life journey. This vacation was a good reminder of that lesson. I could appreciate my strengths and learn from my weaknesses. I could appreciate what the world had to offer in both the creations of Nature and the creations of human beings. I could appreciate what I had and what I didn’t have and keep them in balance. I guess the Spirit decided I needed a friendly kick in the ass. I guess this one was more of a friendly lift rather than a kick.
So here is what I challenge you to do on your journey as a Warrior Goddess. Figure out what you want for the future, really envision it and make a plan to achieve it. These things can be small or big, it does not matter. Now, with full appreciation of what you want and where you are going, look at where you are. What is there that you like? What can you truly be appreciative of? For me, my home, my family and my friends here, not to mention my activities, make it nice to be here, even if I happen to like another landscape better. My life is great and I am happy because I allow myself to be. I hope all of you can do the same.
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author bio:
Athene
Athene comes from a family of Eclectics and has been practicing Paganism from a young age. Athene is an accomplished musician, swimmer, archer, artist, crafter and martial artist. She is active in teaching Pagan spirituality, magick and teaching and learning Judo and Jujitsu. She is also active in promoting equality and balance between genders and races, as well as environmentalism. Athene is well traveled and has been through much of the United States, as well as some traveling in Canada and France.
Athene has faced many challenges in her life, which fortunately she has over come. She tries to use these life experiences as examples to help others grow strong and sure of themselves. Athene’s current life goal is to help women become empowered through pagan spirituality; embracing themselves for who and what they are, overcoming social stigmas such as “thinner is more beautiful” and “women are victims”. She is willing to speak and teach at Pagan events and often will answer questions through email.